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Rating: 2.5 stars

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All movies seen on 12/18/2010

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• Xmas Insanity 2010

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Santa with Muscles (1996)

Directed by John Murlowski

Holiday

Overview

Penurious but muscle-bound Blake Thorne has made a vast fortune marketing health food and health supplements. He once was a nice fellow, but as his wealth increases, he becomes increasingly self-centered and decadent. One day, he gets in a great paint-gun fight that goes too far. Blake escapes the cops by running into a shopping mall, quickly donning a Santa Suit and pretending to be St. Nick. A head injury causes Blake to suffer amnesia, and an opportunistic “elf” decides to convince Blake that he is indeed Santa. This leads “Santa” to help save an orphanage, filled with adorable moppets, from the machinations of a greedy, insane doctor.

Rated PG | Length 98 minutes

Actors

Hulk Hogan | Ed Begley Jr. | Don Stark | Robin Curtis | Clint Howard | Mila Kunis | Adam Wylie | Aria Noelle Curzon | William Newman | Jennifer Paz | Steve Valentine | Kevin West | Diane Robin | Kai Ephron | Garrett Morris | Robert Apisa | Pierre Dulat | Eddy Donno | Andre Kinney | Bentley Shuster | Troy Robinson | Pete Apisa | Brenda Song | Malone Brinton | Bridget Michele | Edward Harrison Leslie | Blake Shuster

Viewing History (seen 1 time)

Viewing Notes

I can’t put into words how bad this movie is, and not necessarily in a fun way. The moral? Science is dumb and evil. But, it had Mila Kunis, a “fashionable” Santa, the most-annoying actress of all time, and Vajamas.

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