Rating: .5 star
Seen 1 time
Seen on: 12/26/2013
Former race car driver Brent Magna is pitted against the clock. Desperately trying to save the life of his kidnapped wife, Brent commandeers a custom Ford Shelby GT500 Super Snake, taking it and its unwitting owner on a high-speed race against time, at the command of the mysterious villain holding his wife hostage.
Rated PG-13 | Length 90 minutes
Very definitely the worst movie I’ve watched in 2013, and probably the worst studio movie I’ve seen in many years. The only reason it gets even a half star is because there’s one long, uncut car chase shot near the end of the film (totally wasted of course) that’s a counterpoint for all the horrible, frantically edited action that’s vomited onto the screen for the rest of the film.
The only thing worse than the horrible editing is the dialogue that flops out of Selena’s Gomez’ mouth like dead fish. Epic bon mots like “I hate you”, “asshole” and “you’re stupid” make you secretly hope her character gets horrifically maimed (but not killed, because that would be too easy) somehow. Sadly, the only people who get maimed during this movie are the audience.
This lifeless piece of shit is everything that is wrong with so much of modern studio cinema all rolled into one easy-to-hate package. If I could unwatch it, I would.